Lately…

Lately life has been, well, busy. Between three kids in school, being school full time myself, having our new fluff-ball Paisley, balancing being a mom & wife…

Lately Audrey has been stable. Ups, downs, good days and bad days, moments of sincere love, happiness and kindness, and also moments of confusion, blind anger, and disappointment in herself. Paisley starts her Puppy Obedience 101 in a couple weeks so I am hoping this will give her a sense of purpose and pride.

Lately I have an overly emotional middle child. She loves everyone so much but then would give anything for a few hours of peace and quiet. She would be content reading books in her sweats or riding her bike alone for a while. She tries so hard to be understanding and tenderhearted in a house where even the most patient person might get twitchy.

Lately my little eight year old has been dramatic. Like, really dramatic over little things. The puppy  scratched her- time to amputate. She has her behavior corrected- all the problems of the world are her fault. She is asked to do her chores- she’s an underpaid maid. She is told she needs to practice her addition and subtraction facts- she can’t do ANYTHING right. I’m not sure why she reacts the way she does. Everything is approached in a level headed manner and in an age appropriate way. The other day I literally just stared at her after trying calm her anxiety over something- I didn’t know what else to say or do. I just stared. On a positive note, she started swim classes and is loving them!

Lately my husband and I barely get anytime to be together alone. The kids are SLOW to get to bed, he works terrible hours (6 am to 330 pm), and has to be in bed by 10 pm in order to function properly the next day. I miss watching our guilty-pleasure TV shows, having time to just talk uninterrupted or to take a day off from everything and just be lazy together. Even with the kids in the house on lazy days we can still give each other some much needed attention. Tomorrow (or today, rather) is his 47th birthday. We’re going to try and get some one-on-one time in.

Lately school has my head spinning. I have a year left, and I just applied for an international internship to Israel. I prayed about it, thought about it, and considered all the logistics of how things would go here at home if I am accepted into the program (which is a short term trip of only 11 days). Deep down I know this is a chance of a lifetime for me; I want this internship so badly. I also became a consultant for Thirty-One Gifts, a company specializing in organizational products, storage products, small purse & wallet line, and a small jewelry line. I was drawn to this company after a friend hosted a fundraiser for our family to help with the costs of getting a service dog. I loved their products and when I realized how much they give back to other organizations every month, it nudged me over the edge. This month they are donating  $75,000 to the Nationwide Childrens Hospital to fund behavioral health research & treatment for young girls. Clearly a topic near and dear to my heart. I am already off to a great start- and no I’m not plugging my business info in here. If you want it, just ask.

Lately I have realized that my family and I are blessed. Yes, life is difficult at times and there are days where I do want to “quit”, but when I put things into perspective it becomes clear that things could really be so much worse. I can get an education and so can my daughters. I can walk safely down my streets without worrying about a civil war going on in my town. I can worship freely. I can help others even when I’m having a bad day. Everyday I am given a new chance to be a better version of myself; to love better, to parent better, to learn better, and to give better. I can access healthcare for myself and my family. I wouldn’t mind a few upgrades in some areas but I have a good life and am thankful in all things.

Lately, when I think I have nothing left to give, God gives me the strength to keep moving on.

Lately, life has been good.

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